Monday, January 5, 2015

Jelly Belly Chris Christie Celebrates Rigged Game in Jerry Jones’ Luxury Suite

Sunday’s NFC wild card playoff at the opulent temple built to honor Dallas Cowboys owner Jerry Jones in Arlington, Texas was chock with drama and intrigue. Normally a matchup between anyone and the Detroit Lions doesn’t draw a national television audience outside of Thanksgiving but the throw down in AT&T Stadium proved to be a thriller. The scrappy Lions, despite a typically offensively woeful performance had a 20-14 lead and were likely driving for the clinching points when an insanely blatant defensive pass interference call was overturned. The botched call - which was so obviously a penalty that even a blind man could have seen it - sucked the life from the Motown squad and set off a gross pageant of celebrations among Cowboys fans across the land.  The biggest of them all - literally - being sitting New Jersey Governor and aspiring GOP presidential candidate Chris Christie.

There were multiple shots of Christie, clad in an ugly red sweater (presumably to show that he is a Republican) going off the chain in Jones’ luxury box. They aren’t very flattering to a guy already having to fend off fat jokes in an image obsessed America. At the culmination of the big Dallas win (NFL official Pete Morelli who picked up the yellow flag was MVP) Christie jumped up and down like an excited little kid and engaged in a group hug with Jerry and another dude. Much to the dismay of Christie backers the shots went viral as quickly as those of accused Florida State rapist and crab leg thief Jameis Winston’s already immortalized Rose Bowl fumble did.

The post-game, internet mockery of Christie had to have Jeb Bush campaign staffers and media wizards jumping for joy over the enormous gift that they had just been given. At least New Jersey taxpayers – who if they are Giants fans HATE the Dallas Cowboys – didn’t have to foot the bill because Jerry Jones did. According to a story from entitled “Dallas owner Jerry Jones paid for Chris Christie's trip to root for Cowboys, including private jet”:

Gov. Chris Christie’s trips to NFL games to root for the Dallas Cowboys were paid for by the team’s owner, Jerry Jones, according to the governor’s office.

Images of Christie celebrating with Jones Sunday evening following the Cowboys’ latest win created a stir among sports fans on social media. Christie has now attended three games at the invitation of Jones, who invited the governor and picked up the tab, said Christie spokesman Kevin Roberts.

“Governor Christie attended the game last night as a guest of Jerry Jones, who provided both the ticket and transportation at no expense to New Jersey taxpayers,” Roberts said.

So I suppose that Mr. Jones was just flying the governor in for the game gratis out of the goodness of his heart and not because he would ever expect anything in return if Chris Christie somehow manages to become president. Just ask NFL head of officiating Dean Blandino what sort of future favors could be done for a romp on the infamous Dallas Cowboys "party bus".

Christie’s brother was apoplectic, going off on a rant attacking critics and those lampooning the sweaty, luxury suite group grope to “GET A LIFE !!!”. I can understand why Todd Christie would be pissed given the perks that guys like Billy Carter and Roger Clinton got after their brothers rolled into the White House.

Forgive the soon to be announced Jeb Bush 2016 campaign for celebrating as if they just won the Super Bowl.